So I’ll actually answer since I’ve never shared this even though the post is making a joke.
It’s not really murder I’m sure, but it has stuck with me forever. I took care of my grandmother through the end stages of her cancer as some form of “hospice” care. I was the one that gave her morphine when she needed it and essentially within days of starting it she became more and more zombified and then passed away. It happened within roughly a week. It was only after all that did learn about morphine toxicity in the elderly and realized that even though it helped her with the pain I’m pretty sure I “killed” her. :(
For what it’s worth, if i ever find myself elderly with end stage cancer, I would consider it a kindness to be able to go out painlessly and relatively quickly.
I think it’s not so nice from the doctor, to not warn you about what’s going to happen. Especially since you were the one carrying it out. I guess as a professional, they should know about the consequences of drugs they prescribe. Unless they’re somewhat incompetent, this may very well have been the intended/welcome/unavoidable outcome. And I think you’d have deserved a heads-up. Idk if that had helped you. But it’s probably hard. Some relatives will not let go. And you can’t refuse palliative care. So maybe the ethical way is to not talk too much after you got to a certain point.
Where I live it’s legal. There’s paperwork, a psychological interview of the patient and it must be done by somebody who is allowed to do so. My grandfather went like that. Even though it’s sad, I’m glad he got to go before it became even worse.
So people with end stage cancer do often deteriorate like that, the morphine is unlikely to have caused her death but it would have definitely made her more comfortable.
You did the right thing for your grandma. You didn’t speed up her death, you cared for her through a difficult time.
Thank you for being there for them.
If this is playing on your mind get in touch with the hospice/ palliative care team who were involved and talk it through with them. They will be happy to help and won’t mind you calling at all, even if it is a long time since it happened.
I’m so sorry that happened, truly. Honestly, though, you deserved to have better medical guidance during that time and it really isn’t your fault for not knowing. I think that at that point, though, it was way more important for her to be comfortable above all else. She was lucky to have you there.
So I’ll actually answer since I’ve never shared this even though the post is making a joke.
It’s not really murder I’m sure, but it has stuck with me forever. I took care of my grandmother through the end stages of her cancer as some form of “hospice” care. I was the one that gave her morphine when she needed it and essentially within days of starting it she became more and more zombified and then passed away. It happened within roughly a week. It was only after all that did learn about morphine toxicity in the elderly and realized that even though it helped her with the pain I’m pretty sure I “killed” her. :(
For what it’s worth, if i ever find myself elderly with end stage cancer, I would consider it a kindness to be able to go out painlessly and relatively quickly.
100%. At that point your life is over already. Dose me up on morphine and let me sail away into the void peacefully.
Euthanasia isnt really murder.
I mean if someone has a terminal illness and asked you to give them cyanide and you do, that not really murder.
Sure the law views it differently, but it morally not murder.
Yeah, and it was all “above board” as they say so I’m fine as far as the law goes. Doctor prescribed, followed hospice advice, etc…
Still considering it was the morphine that actually did her in, being the one who gave it to her made me feel responsible for her passing in a way.
I’m sorry for your pain and guilt. If I was in your grandmas position, though, morphine toxicity is how I’d prefer to go.
I think it’s not so nice from the doctor, to not warn you about what’s going to happen. Especially since you were the one carrying it out. I guess as a professional, they should know about the consequences of drugs they prescribe. Unless they’re somewhat incompetent, this may very well have been the intended/welcome/unavoidable outcome. And I think you’d have deserved a heads-up. Idk if that had helped you. But it’s probably hard. Some relatives will not let go. And you can’t refuse palliative care. So maybe the ethical way is to not talk too much after you got to a certain point.
Where I live it’s legal. There’s paperwork, a psychological interview of the patient and it must be done by somebody who is allowed to do so. My grandfather went like that. Even though it’s sad, I’m glad he got to go before it became even worse.
So people with end stage cancer do often deteriorate like that, the morphine is unlikely to have caused her death but it would have definitely made her more comfortable. You did the right thing for your grandma. You didn’t speed up her death, you cared for her through a difficult time. Thank you for being there for them.
If this is playing on your mind get in touch with the hospice/ palliative care team who were involved and talk it through with them. They will be happy to help and won’t mind you calling at all, even if it is a long time since it happened.
‘If I’m gonna die, at least I wanna be high.’
- ❤️×💀×🤖
Seriously tho, the only death that could be better is being high in a puppy pit.
I’m so sorry that happened, truly. Honestly, though, you deserved to have better medical guidance during that time and it really isn’t your fault for not knowing. I think that at that point, though, it was way more important for her to be comfortable above all else. She was lucky to have you there.
I work in palliative care, and if she was in pain and you gave her morphine according to prescription, you did the right thing.