I’m glad you are very considerate and have never made a mistake when excited about something before. Good for you friend.
I’m serious, though. How do you make that “mistake”? How do you get so excited that you completely tunnel-vision out the simultaneous existence of hundreds of people? That’s absolutely in no way neurotypical.
It’s news that occurred somewhere in the world, I guess. That’s what all the “US news is world news!” people were saying in the meta thread.
It’s not just me. If I was literally the only other person in the store, sure, I could understand that, they thought they were alone, they weren’t expecting to encounter anyone else.
How the fuck do you just stop being aware of an entire seething mass of other humans flowing around you?
Yes, I am incredibly unfriendly when I’m trying to get my shit done. I want to be out of that place as fast as fucking possible. I don’t want to linger, I don’t want to chat, and I sure as fuck have never in my life been so distracted that a hundred other moving, talking people just vanished completely from my awareness. Is that some kind of ADHD thing? Some manifestation of executive dysfunction, like always being late and never letting anyone else talk in a conversation if they can’t actively shout over you?
What mental disorder does this fall into?
This is totally bouncing off of me. How can a person, in a public space, surrounded at all times by other people, just forget they exist for any amount of time, for any reason? They’re fucking everywhere. They’re breathing, they’re talking, their cart wheels are squeaking, the footsteps from their rubber-soled shoes are echoing off the hard tile floors, how do your senses just stop registering any of that?
Hey man if you want to read every interaction in the worst possible light that’s on you.
Please suggest to me a better way to read an interaction in which someone in a very crowded public place just happens to forget that the possibility exists that another human might also need to get down that aisle. “Oopsie doodle! I forgot I was surrounded by a hundred people who would really rather get this chore done as fast as possible! Again! Silly me!”
Give me a charitable interpretation of that person who doesn’t take even a split second to consider anyone else in their environment without having to be verbally admonished.
What’s the metric unit for depression?
but most of us will also correct our mistake if it’s brought to our attention
Most of us will literally never make that “mistake” because we’re aware that other people exist, even when nobody’s standing next to us screaming “HEY, I EXIST! CAN YOU TAKE THAT INTO ACCOUNT PLEASE?”
People aren’t mind readers and they aren’t purposely trying to make your life harder.
Oh, now I get it. They just don’t even notice or acknowledge the existence of other people unless someone reminds them that such mythical beings exist.
Yeah, you’re right, I’m much more sympathetic to them now. They’re not mean, they’re just amazingly self-centered and oblivious!
a handful of times at most
You must have Shaq’s hands, because I’ve experienced this literally every time I’ve gone to a grocery store throughout my entire adult life.
Get the fuck out of the way or someone less hinged than I am is going to move you.
You’re totally right, that makes me feel so much better about having to wait idly for the next 19 minutes rather than get my shopping done. They’re not in my way, they’re connecting! I should try to connect with them, too!
Wow, they left. Why don’t they want to connect anymore?
I’m 6’5". I’d love to hear your suggestions for what I should do with my legs when you recline your seat. Do you think I can just take them off? Am I supposed to sit sideways with my legs in the lap of the person next to me? Am I supposed to do Yoga for a year before I get on a plane, so I can spread my knees out 180 degrees from each other and you can lay your head on my dick?
I’m not “slamming my knees into the back of your seat”. They simply exist where you’re trying to be, and the fundamental properties of matter are causing them to collide. You can be as pissed about your comfort as you want to be, but it’s not going to change my knees into ethereal ghost knees so your seat can lean back.
On Kbin, at the bottom of the comment, under “more”, there’s an option to “copy URL”. You can use that to link back to this comment next time you have the chance to roo.
I don’t know if it works the same way on Lemmy.
Oh, but you do! I’m one of those autistic people who can’t fucking stand flaming red notification icons and have to make them go away.
There’s no way to turn off the notification without either clicking “Ignore” or “Reply” (maybe it’s “Accept”). It doesn’t go away just from reading the message. I even tried to disable the element in my browser, which worked, but then it disabled the normal notification icon too.
Jesus, is this what we’re doing with Lemmy? Posting memes older than my kids?
a fucking chat on fucking reddit are you kidding me what?
RIGHT? AND, AND! It’s a chat where you can’t get rid of the bright flaming red notification until you make the neigh-irreversible decision to either shun a person forever or reply to them.
It doesn’t weed out anything but honest people.
That’s like saying a pre-flight check doesn’t throw up errors on anything anything but honest machines. But, more to the point, you’re right, in the sense that the people on either tail end of the “good/bad people” bell curve aren’t going to be precisely detected by a simple test of inclusion/exclusion criteria. The ~60% of people in the middle will be. That’s why it’s a screening tool, not an in-depth socio-psychological exam.
As long as your honesty comes closer to filling the socially expected role than, say, a man who’s high on meth or a Qanon conspiracist who thinks “how are you?” is a sex-trafficker code, you’re probably ok.
I agree. That’s exactly what I do. Memorize two or three different socially acceptable answers to each of the half-dozen or so most common “human vibe check” questions.
Because that’s exactly what they are. They’re human vibe checks. It’s not about finding out how you’re really feeling, or what you honestly think of the weather. It’s about being a quick way to sort out who is capable of of functioning in a social capacity and who isn’t, without putting in a lot of time and effort doing an in-depth screening.
“Small talk” is culturally designed to weed out 70-80% of those people who are likely to be dangerous, unstable, or unreliable, allowing us to know who we need to pay close attention to in our environment and who we probably don’t. It’s not a question of “lying” or “telling the truth”, it’s a question of “can you perform your socially expected role in this cultural ritual?”.
Saying “I’m fine, how are you?” is no more “lying” than doing a safety check on an airplane you’re about to fly is (because you don’t actually need to engage the flaps right now, being on the ground and all). It’s just about checking to make sure the right lights come on and the right motors engage. If a person can’t even answer a question they’ve had decades to prepare for, and can’t engage, even to a minimum acceptable degree, in a small social ceremony they’ve watched thousands of times and had hundreds of opportunities to practice themselves, that’s a bad sign. That’s like trying to engage the flaps and hearing some weird grinding noise and getting a red blinking light on the console.
It’s important to note here that I have a bit of an advantage in this arena over a lot of the rest of the community. One of my deepest autistic hyperfocus areas has been observing, experimenting, and collecting data on human interpersonal communications, specifically linguistic communication. It’s all very ritualistic, at its base, and it’s easy for me to create, memorize, and practice the scripts for performing those rituals in different contexts. And when I fuck one up, I can go back through and memorize another script so if that same conversation every comes up in the future (and it will, because there are only so many rituals!), I won’t fuck it up again (to the same degree).
Yes, motherfuckers, I do demand that all of my morals and beliefs be as close to 100% internally consistent as possible, and yes, I actually believe them all the time. Who are these assholes saying hypocrisy and amoral selfishness are fucking good things?
Old Reddit is Reddit. If they get rid of it, I’m sure as fuck not sticking around for this new site. It looks like Bing and Youtube had a deformed little monster-child.