Time to decorate the holiday tree.

  • spudwart@spudwart.comEnglish
    23·
    11 months ago

    The War on Christmas is real.

    And I’m tired of pretending we started it.

    They struck first. Invading Thanksgiving and New Years. But like all memorable wars they started within their own borders.

    Conquering the lesser known holidays in their ranks. As well as the weekends. Then they expanded into November and January. Then into February and October.

    The war continued until they had conquered Halloween, Labor Day, and it had gone so far that they had conquered July. “Christmas in July” they said.

    11 months of Christmas. They had almost taken it all. Then, just as all hope was lost, just as it been considered a lost cause. They stopped.

    Christmas stagnated. For 60 long years we waited.

    Enduring losses and louder (and earlier) Christmas carols. Planting their lights and decorations unto our territories. Creating propaganda and even launching pressure campaigns.

    Labeled Humbugs, Grinches and worse for daring to stand against Christmas.

    But slowly as the songs got older, and the propaganda aged. Fewer and Fewer dared to pressure those who stood against Christmas.

    We took our months back. We didn’t even know It, but we had just awoken a sleeping monster.

    As we regained July and September, we slowly took back the early months, may, April, march…

    We managed to start encompassing the holiday season. That’s when it began. The War on Christmas, or so those on the side of Christmas claim. But we know better.

    Happy Holidays.

    • Toribor@corndog.socialEnglish
      9·
      11 months ago

      I worship the old gods. The ones with forgotten names that live in the deep places of the earth. Now it is their day. Give gifts and be jolly for when they rise to reclaim this universe they will open one of their sixteen mouths and sing the song that ends the world.