Any recent victories or challenges?
I’ve never been this stressed in my entire life. It hits me each morning precisely the second I wake up.
Got laid off from work recently. I don’t feel like finding a new job because I have 10 years of experience and I know I don’t like working for someone else. It feels meaningless. I don’t want to spend my life like that. What’s the alternatine? Well besides the extremely unlikely event of winning the lottery I feel like the only other option is to start my own handyman bussiness that I’ve been “dreaming of” for who knows how many years. I don’t however mean that I have some deep passion for entrepreneurship because I don’t. Not at all. I just feel like it’s the only other option I have and there’s atleast a slight chance that I might like it. Hell, it could even end up being one of the best decisions in my life. Maybe. I don’t know, and I’ll never find out if I don’t try it.
But doubt. Oh so much doubt. This is by-far the biggest and scariest decision I’ve had to make ever. I know I can just end it if it’s not working out and find a job and that’s that but it just feels so permanent. It feels like I’m putting my entire future on the line. It almost feels like risking my life. It’s stupid and I know it. I just can’t help it. No amount of reasoning is enough to fight off my emotions on this. I’m absolutely and completely terrified.
I know it’s small, but I made up with my wife and told her I don’t like being treated the was she acted. I asked her to talk more with me about what she needs rather than bottle it up. We have some healing, but I feel like it’s an upward swing.
I have spent the last 5 days seething about the rise of fascism in my country.
So, not good.
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Am currently caring for my mother on hospice. Fuck cancer.
I have two big projects I want to make in rust. This is nice because I haven’t been able to think of projects I could make in a while.
Currently Waiting for a tow truck because my clutch pipe burst while I’m an hour and a half away from home. Lovely, and probably expensive
Getting divorced, but started therapy. Bit of a mixed bag really.
Ive been applying to a remote first company I want to work for for about 3 weeks now and ive got 1 failed interview and about 30 reject letters. Can’t complain, ive got a good job now, but I want to go back to remote work
I can’t save money because of my home and car loans. Hell, I wouldn’t be able to eat if it weren’t for my parents helping me out with cooking cheap meals and borrowing money, which I always feel like shit for doing. My job tires me out enough that I can’t work up the energy to fight past my ADHD paralysis to job hunt for one that pays more. I can’t get a raise because of said ADHD paralysis fucking with my productivity. I also can’t work up the energy to clean up and repair enough that I could rent my place out and move back in with my parents. And selling the house is off the table—my parents are the only ones that are close enough to my work for me to be able to make it without a three hour drive, and they’ve got a full house atm.
I was rejected for a refinance that would’ve bought me $400 a month worth of breathing room. And the energy credit is running out soon, so I’m about to start being $200-300 in the hole.
I can’t work up the energy to go out and meet someone who could be my significant other, even if that were something I had any skill or confidence in doing.
Hell, I look at my mates and they’ve got their shit on better lock than I do in some ways. Brian and Marcus have rented their house out and moved back in with their parents, ended up making about $400 a month in profit. Nate doesn’t even have a job, but he has a wife (which is really confusing, considering how he looks), and their combined Centrelink payments let them save up for big purchases they may need to make. Even Carol has a partner and a job at a casino making double what I do. (Names changed for privacy)
BUT!
I have gone through too much, survived too much to let all the effort of doing so go to waste. Even if it ends up being useless in the end, I’m going to take every opportunity I can force myself to take in order to get myself into a better place. No way in hell I’m letting the world push me into a corner without giving it a black eye on the way.
Love the attitude in the last paragraph. I’ve got ADHD too, I find if I pick a time/day to do something (like applying to jobs) and tell someone my plan, I can force myself into not pushing it off. Applying to jobs definitely isn’t a fun experience but I recently changed jobs myself and it honestly feels refreshing. Like starting a new chapter.
Bad and no
Nice to see a prevalent positive comment section among the usual gloom and doom in lemmy.
No big victories or challenges for myself, all going boring but fine overall. Which is kinda a victory, I guess?
Victories: My girlfriend and I are doing a lot better than we were a few months ago. I have only missed 2 assignments this semester and I finally found a method of organization that works for me. I go to class at least half the time which is a lot more than before. Doing good so far :)
Challenges: My insomnia has been a nightmare recently, I’ve slept 1 out of the past 4 nights and only because I bummed some weed of off a close friend. I haven’t eaten in 16+ hrs and my stomach hurts, I’m getting nauseous and bloated and I couldn’t make it to my 9am class because I was afraid of puking on the way there.
U intersted in trying something different tonight Re:Sleep?
Wdym by that?
I mean: are you willing to try something easy and dead simple to sleep like the dead perchance?
Have at it, I’ll take all the advice I can get
I’ll do it in baby steps and keep the dialogue open. Okay, you ready to try what I suggest tonight, promise? It’ll be easy
Dawg you’re stringing me a long It’s not a gun right?
No way. So here’s what I want you to do: (step 1)
- Get an album or even better, an audiobook for a story you love. Go do that and make sure you really “have it” (nobody can undownload or delete it, taking it away somyou can maintain your consistent structure)
You need something you like and that doesn’t rattle you + you’ll be cool with listening to like everynight. Don’t worry so much about being bored or whatever: if all goes well, you won’t be listening too long to the point you may never finish it lol
Edit:
- are you on Android/iPhone?
- can you make sure you have it completely dark? Whether ambiently or by wearing a comfy sleep mask?
Left a toxic study group and I feel so much lighter and hsppy because of it. Have more time to myself and things that hold interest just for me and my enjoyment. ETA a Word.
It was a case study [group] if toxic study group politics…
What was there to be toxic about, was this Community?
Suburban housewives trying to learn a new language through osmosis. It is discouraging to be in a group where noone does the work and tries to actually learn instead thinking that paying for something is enough to master x or y.
Got tired and left.
Victories: got conditionally accepted for my 2nd choice for uni (still haven’t told any close friends until I hear back from all schools and make a decision)
Challenges: I’m taking linear algebra and diff eq. It’s the first week and I forgot how to take derivatives and integrals. I’ve been staring at the problem for hours and still don’t get how to take the derivative for e^(y/x).
Here comes my boomer moment:
You kids have it so easy with technology these days. Back in my day we really had to stare at equations or wait for office hours with the prof.
Then it came Wolfram Alpha which showed you step by step how to integrate an equation if you wrote it into the prompt.
Nowadays with ChatGPT/Gemini/xyz you can just take a picture of your homework and it will solve it for you (and explain it in any level of detail that you want, if you care about learning). You can have it explain differential equations talking like a pirate, if you want.
Very understandable. I wouldn’t go with A.I. it’s pretty shit for math, but there are calculators out there like wolfram better suited for this. I like struggling first and if I need to use those tools, then I might. My school also has a math tutoring center but as linear is the final sequence, there is less help for that. Some profs probably forgot it.
